Mothers, Fathers:
Bless me, for I have sinned.
I bore myself into this life
And promptly forgot,
Knew not my own heart song,
Nor how to hear it.
I pushed, then locked myself away,
Allowed this world to silence me,
Whispered my truth unknowingly where
No one would hear,
Shared nothing of myself
Save that which was demanded,
Commanded.
I found faith and hope in nothing,
Did not fight hard enough for what
I felt was right.
I grew up too fast. I always tried to escape.
Bless me, I have always known,
I have always heard something.
You have been with me all along,
Guiding my steps gently to where I am now
And I have no more apologies,
Only thanks; deep, immense thanks.
My thanks I give to you for everything
I've so far been through, and
I understand now that nothing has happened to me,
Only for me.
You have shown me signs, sent me allies,
Turned up the volume of nature so I can hear her,
Given me lessons that I might walk through
The mirrors that show me my self,
Shown me all the pain and all the love that is possible,
And now I have everything I need for now.
You have given me dreams and
This power of discernment,
My art and my craft,
The fortitude and endurance to hone my skills
Natural born.
I am only born,
A unique gift from my mother and father.
No one else has the blood I have in me.
I see, and I thank thee.
You are me, you are my memory
And there is no real fear,
Only unravellings of mysteries.
I realise I mistreated, punished and polluted
My body
For lack of understanding.
In anxiety I went wandering, lost
And bewildered by the path that I set
Before my self for this life.
I am sorry for all the misery and damage I may have caused,
On this, my blessed path to rememberance.
I am here. You are welcome to be here.
I invite you - come and sit down with me.
Tell me your stories.
Stay with me here by this fire I am preparing.
Eat with me.
Pray with me.
Walk with me.
Sleep with me next to the fire.
Teach me how to live.
Show me how to listen, feel, see, travel.
Show me what is going on.
Stay with me. Walk with me.
I am so happy to meet you.
When they ask me, "How did you come
To meet your ancestors?" I will say:
"I got angry. And my anger invited them closer
And they began to answer me
In a language I understood
But in which I was not yet fluent.
I realised they were with me all the time
But I was blind, deaf..."
I must have asked the right question,
But it was you who refined my ways of asking.
I thank you.
I thank you for guiding me to the Living Elders;
Thank you for patching through The Call.
They show me I am not born in original sin
But in Original Beauty,
Out of and through Original Beauty.
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'I am here to uphold the honour of being human.
I am here to reclaim the honour of being given
This place on the sacred hoop of life.'
- Pat McCabe/Woman Stands Shining, of the Dine (Navajo) Nation
